Small Gestures You Can Do to Show Your Love
Feb05

Small Gestures You Can Do to Show Your Love

Actions speak louder than words. We are all too familiar with this age-old saying. Indeed, what you do says a lot more than what you say. So how do you show someone you love them? From the simple to the grand, we are capable of doing things for our special someone all in the name of love. You can leave them simple notes if you want to keep things low key or do something bold and send flowers to an international destination if your loved one is currently abroad. There are many ways you can show a person your love and make them feel loved, even without saying a word. Here are some gestures of love you can do for the most important person in your life. Make time for them. One of the best things you can give your significant other is your time. Always make it a point to spend time with them. This is one way of letting them know you are always there for them. Talk over dinner at home and ask them how their day went. Take a few minutes from your busy schedule to give them a call or send a text asking how they are doing. If you’ve been loaded with work the whole week, schedule a date or a simple picnic on the weekend. Pay attention to them. When you spend time with your loved one, pay attention to them as well. Listen to what they say. They could be rambling about a movie they recently watched, a video game or their bad day at work. Listen to them especially if it’s something serious or important. You can learn a lot by...

Read More
Ladies: We are Secret Sadistic Devils!
Oct15

Ladies: We are Secret Sadistic Devils!

The soothing relaxing aroma of perfumed oils and candles, the smooth and tranquil tones from the background music, the clean fresh sheets on a very comfortable bed, lying back buck naked with a towel around the nakedness waiting for the pain to start! Nope, this is not a scene from 50 Shades of Grey – it’s the monthly grooming session at the expensive Spa! Although – the torture involved is probably close if not more sadistic than a scene with Christian Grey! The lovely soft-spoken lady (who views your girly parts with more scrutiny than your Gynaecologist) standing at the bottom of the bed readying the torture material to rid you of any unsightly excess hair! As a modern-day woman, there are many things we do on a regular basis to make ourselves presentable to the outside world. The daily rituals of painting our faces, taming our hair and then the meticulous selection and re-selection of our clothes. The weekly dues of facials, manicure’s and pedicure’s. And then there is the monthly grooming practice that only you and whomever has the privilege of seeing your butt (pun intended) naked self will get to admire!   I asked a number of ladies on why they put themselves through all of this, and whether it was for the benefit of being attractive or desirable to the mate they are trying to attract? Believe it or not, the belief of beautifying ourselves for the reasons of attraction is a...

Read More
Rock Solid Guns & Buns of Steel – The Perfect Man?
Sep29

Rock Solid Guns & Buns of Steel – The Perfect Man?

  Broad solid shoulders, angry sweat laden faces, six/eight packs (apparently they do exist!), thick sculptured thighs and of course the buns of steel! Yes Ladies – it’s the Rugby World Cup! The men in our lives are watching the games religiously for the pure adrenaline rush, National pride and in the back of their minds thinking they are as tough and mean as the men on the pitch. As much as the ladies like to support their favourite team, National pride and in general, just enjoy watching the sport – there is always the hot-blooded female in us that appreciates all that is beautiful in the male form disguised as the rugged Rugby player. As with all social drunken evenings between a group of good friends, inappropriate conversation is the order of the evening; the subject of what type of “Man” they were in terms of what they found as most attractive “physically” in a woman! (Hey, it was a drunken evening – all sexist remarks go straight out of the window!) Answers ranged from the typical breasts, legs, buttocks to colour of hair or colour of eyes! This had the ladies reciprocating back on what is “hot” and what is “not” for the male form! Yes, I believe we were more on the road to blottoed than just merely drunk!   A few of my female friends are still looking for their perfect “other-half” with a number of them using the latest in social media dating sites. We are mostly led to believe that it’s mostly...

Read More
Wives – The Modern Day Super Heroes
Sep17

Wives – The Modern Day Super Heroes

Staring at a sink full of dishes and the bomb site that is my kitchen, I do what I always do; I roll my shirt sleeves up and start the cleaning process. Alas, this is my cliché married life. My husband is a good cook, but every time he cooks, the kitchen is a scene from a horror movie! He has tried washing up in the past, but I think he intentionally does it badly so that I don’t ask him to do it regularly! I put up with his feet up on the coffee table when he is watching TV; dirty clothes on the bathroom or bedroom floor; used mugs, plates, cutlery either haphazardly left around the tables, desks, and/or kitchen (but not sink!); even his annoying habit of emptying his pockets of keys, phone, lint, receipts, coins (why do men always just spend notes and leave the coins? What do they expect we’ll do with the jars and jars of change?) on the bedside table every evening instead of the designated “bowl” I have set aside for all his crap! Despite all of the annoying little things (that automatically become big things during the hormonal week!), he is the man who I vowed to love for better or for worse and that I am blessed to have him in my life. The jobs of today’s wives are not in any wedding rule books. Wives are now creatures that work hard, play hard and love hard!  We manage the home, the finances, the kids, the extended family, the friends, the extended friends AND the whinging husband! It’s a never-ending job,...

Read More
Are You Ever Too Old to Have a Teddy Bear?
Sep07

Are You Ever Too Old to Have a Teddy Bear?

      I went through an era in my life that I loved and thought every stuffed toy was the biz! Except for Chucky! He was the bane of some of my most frightening childhood nightmares! A toy that could talk, wields a knife and has scary eyes – I could not look at any toy for months in fear that they would come to life! Strangely, not unlike the new star of the Teddy Bear world, “TED”, though instead of a knife, this “cute” looking teddy bear has a foul mouth and spouts sexual innuendoes at everything he sees. For some reason I was never a fan of the plastic dolls (Barbies & Cindys). Even at a young age I thought those types of toys were a little too girly for me, but a lot of my girlfriends would go out of their way to play with their Barbies and Kens and make happy families for them.   My interest started at Cabbage Patch Dolls. When they first came out on to the market they were cute (real definition – UGLY but INTERESTING). It was like looking at a really ugly baby – I can almost hear the shocked gasp of a million Mom’s saying “There is no such thing as an ugly baby”!  These little darlings had huge round heads, round stunned eyes, snubby noses and cheeks so rounded it looked like a bag of Marshmallows was stuffed in there.    My next phase with stuffed toys came later in life. I started to make up for it by winning stuffed toys from fairs and those arcade point-and-grab machines. I...

Read More
Modern Day Parents – Total Respect!
Aug28

Modern Day Parents – Total Respect!

  Stale milk smell…puffy, red, bloodshot eyes… pallid skin the colour of a grey dawn – Yep – My friend is now a new Mummy! Despite the vision in front of me looking as though she would keel over from exhaustion, there was a glint in her eyes and her twist in her smile that said “This was all worth it!” Her husband,  dummy clenched in his mouth, running between kitchen and bathroom, simultaneously (allegedly!) working on heating up a bottle of milk whilst running a bath for  baby – shattered, but again the new “Daddy” exuded an aura of “ I wouldn’t change a thing”.  This, my dear readers is the start of “Parenthood”.   Let me just point out that I have yet to be “blessed” with the bliss of parenthood. I see children growing up way too fast these days! They make you laugh; they make you cry; they even make you want to hide in a cupboard and scream “What have I done to deserve this?”. There are many titles for these new Childhood developments: “Terrible Twos”, “Threenagers”, “F*#king Fours”, and the list goes on till they hit “The Rebellious Teenage Years” and the “Mooching Twenties”! But do you care?   Being a Parent is a fun, scary, emotional roller coaster of a ride, that no-one can predict.  Society, as a whole, has moved on from when I was a child. No longer is it accepted to threaten the Children to behave with a wooden spoon or a ruler. It’s now all about understanding...

Read More
My woes of giving a perfect gift to my Dad!
Aug26

My woes of giving a perfect gift to my Dad!

It’s Father’s Day this coming 6th September and I am at a complete loss as to what gift to get my Dad! It’s the same every year! Only with Parents do you end up getting three gifts a year! Birthday, Mother’s/Father’s Day and Christmas!  Mums are easy – anything goes! Flowers, Perfume, Clothes, Food, Spa treatment, etcetera. The list is endless for Mothers! When I was younger, the classic Father’s Day gifts were Socks & Jocks, T-Shirts, Belts, Ties or Boxer Shorts. On the odd occasion whereby his Electric Razor was broken, (and that I’d saved enough from my pocket-money and scrounged the rest from my other sisters to make this a joint gift!) we’d get him something useful! There was no point in even wrapping the gifts as they were so obvious! Now that I am all grown up and working for a living, and my Dad having recently retired, I thought “This is my time to shine! This is when I can be inventive with my gifts!”. Little did I know that this was an even bigger task than I thought! Since retirement, my Dad has had very few hobbies. He likes to walk/go hiking, cooking and watch TV (mostly sport), sometimes read the odd classic book; but that’s about it! I tried to buy him hiking boots – he didn’t like the way they fitted (they’re still in a box under the staircase – because he is STILL a typical man and does not go back to shops to RETURN things! EVER!). I tried to buy him cookbooks – he said he likes to...

Read More
A wine a day keeps the whining away
Aug21

A wine a day keeps the whining away

I had a bad (understatement of the year!) day; everything that could go wrong went wrong! Let me set the scene for you: When you set your alarm for work to wake you up at 5:00am, you wake up at 6am and start screaming at your phone, then you realise that the alarm was set for 5:00PM instead of AM! You run for the morning commute and your heel breaks off, you arrive just in time to the office building and because you’re waiting for the lift – you’re ten minutes late, you’re making your morning cup of coffee and your mug slips and crashes on the floor! Seriously – the day carried on in that way! We’ve all been there! My experience says that after a day like that – your evening can only get better! Do you plan an evening in with your loved one and just cuddle up and watch TV? Arrange to meet friends and have an evening of dinner and conversation (albeit you will be reiterating most of your terrible day verbatim to dampen their evenings!) or spend the evening pampering yourself (whereby you’ll mull over the terrible day and wonder how you could have done it differently!).   On evenings like this, I tend to find myself with a glass of wine venting my woes to anyone who will listen (exit loved ones as they have heard it time and time again!). Seriously – pets are fantastic listeners! My cat “Bubbles” is a great conversationalist – she lets me vent and offers her meows as answers of her understanding that I am not...

Read More
Happy Mother’s Day! Everyday!
Aug07

Happy Mother’s Day! Everyday!

I love my Mom, really I do! But oh – how she can test my patience! OH MY GOODNESS, OH MY GOODNESS, OH MY GOODNESS! The indescribable rage I have in my head right now is almost too much for me to bear. The only thing I want to do is to storm out of the house, slam the door behind me, walk up an enormous hill, and never come back to my crazy household. Seriously, I bet there are millions of young people out there who are in exactly the same position as me; when you and your Mom are having the worst fight ever, nobody is willing to back down, and all you want to do is to storm out of the front door tears streaming down your face, vowing never to come back home. On most occasions, this tantrum is shared, word for word with my best friend, as we basically experience the same situation at least a few times a month. But her situation is usually about studies, whereas mine… well, mine was actually about cookies… I mean, what’s wrong with just having a little mess in my bedroom? It’s my bedroom! I demand the right to make it look as if a clothes bomb has gone off amid the organised chaos, right? Every now and then I’ve got to add some personality to my space; after all, I am an artist and I am supposed to be rebellious and insane (sometimes!). Which is why, I like to play around with food sometimes to explore my creativity and originality… I know…it’s deep stuff, and “Drama Queen” is not my nickname! Looking...

Read More
The Happiest Person
Jul17

The Happiest Person

The Happiest Person Who wouldn’t love to be more happy? According to Instagram sensation Grandma Betty, happiness is living every moment with love, grace and gratitude. Pharrell Williams mentioned Grandma Betty on his Instagram account, which introduced her to a large number of his fans worldwide. Using this platform, she spread her joy, optimism, and happiness to as many people as possible, in particular to those with cancer. She insisted she would stay happy until the end, despite having lost her husband and daughter to cancer and having lung cancer herself. Sadly, Grandma Betty passed away in August last year. However, while alive she inspired hundreds of thousands of people to be happy and always smile, no matter what.  As she says in the video below, she wanted to become a Grandma to everyone, and I am sure most of her over 600,000 fans on Instagram would have loved to have had her as theirs. Do you have a Grandma or other mature woman who has inspired you? If so count yourself lucky to have that sort of happiness in your life. Whether or not yours is the happiest in the world, all Grans are a beautiful inspiration. Take this opportunity opportunity to remember your dear old (or not so old!) Grandmothers. Pick up the phone, send her flowers or even a special ‘hello’ Facebook, to let her know that she’s in your thoughts....

Read More
The Dancing Granny
Jul16

The Dancing Granny

The Dancing Granny Nerea Auma of  is a 65 year old grandma from Atemo, a village in Homa Bay county, Kenya. The ultimate dancing queen, or rather the dancing Granny, she has 10 children and 18 grandchildren, but she beats all of them when it comes to dancing. Nerea began dancing as a young girl and it continues to bring her joy. According to her, life is about finding happiness within you, and she found her happiness in dance. Her dancing is a key attraction at private and public functions, both locally and beyond and she has remained unbeaten on the dance floor for decades. Her husband is also a bit of a local dancing sensation, and they met, of course, on the dance floor. Do you have a dancing Granny? If so count yourself lucky to have that sort of happiness in your life. Whether or not yours is a dancing queen, all Grans are a beautiful inspiration. Take this opportunity opportunity to remember your dear old (or not so old!) Grandmothers. Pick up the phone, send her flowers or even a special ‘hello’ Facebook, to let her know that she’s in your thoughts....

Read More
What is Romance?
Jul10

What is Romance?

What is romance? A common mistake made by men is believing that once they are in a committed relationship, they no longer need to put in the extra effort to maintain the attention of the person they have been pursuing. These same men are often unable to figure out why every one of their relationships ends once the initial sizzle has passed. They know all of the right tricks to be successful in the game of dating, but never quite able to turn lust into true love. Sweet text messages and ‘I miss you’ voice mails are a great start, but when constantly being repeated without adding more, they can easy begin to seem like eating the same kind of sandwich for lunch day after day. A exciting surprise will only produce a warm feeling for so long before it becomes a boring routine. Opening a door is a great habit, but any common stranger can provide the same effect. True romance is breath taking. It’s having to listen to a quite pause because the other person can not find the right words to say. In my opinion, romance is not a thought or a feeling, it is a action. It is holding hands in a vehicle when no one else can witness the occasion, except your one special person. It is capturing a stare between locked eyes for so long that you become blind to all of your surroundings. It can not be described by many words because it isn’t experienced enough. Having your breath taken away does not have to hurt...

Read More
Marriage: Escapes Together
Jul08

Marriage: Escapes Together

Most married couples have activities that they do together and some that they do on their own. While it is good to have hobbies, couples’ counselor Dr. Harley, with Marriage Builders, argues that we should share our enjoyable activities with our partner. This would include escapes away from the day to day life of jobs, kids and other things that can be stressful. It is logical that the more time spent together doing enjoyable activities will increase your enjoyment of each other. When you and your husband were dating, you spent almost all of your recreational time with each other. That’s one of the reasons you fell in love with each other. And you married because you were in love. But after marriage, especially after children arrive, it becomes increasingly difficult for most couples to arrange their recreational time together. You probably followed the common strategy of new parents which is for one parent to stay home with the children while the other escapes from it all. Marriage, and raising children, can force a husband and wife to be together when they are unhappy, because they become partners in situations that are stressful. So after having children, it’s even more important for them to spend their most enjoyable time with each other, than it was when they were dating. They need to compensate for the stressful time they spend with each other raising their children by taking time to escape...

Read More
Romantic Ideas: Outrageous
Jun26

Romantic Ideas: Outrageous

  Romance. We could all use more of it. While our previous posts on romantic ideas focused on more conventional approaches, this one covers ways to light that fire that are a bit more outrageous. These are sure to make a big impression! Visit a karaoke bar and surprise your lover by getting up and singing “your song” to him/her.   Kidnap her! Blindfold her. Drive her around town until she’s thoroughly lost. Then reveal your destination: Her favorite restaurant, or maybe a romantic inn.   Make a giant greeting card out of a big cardboard box, (such as the type used to pack a refrigerator).   Does your partner love M&M’s? Fill a one-gallon glass jar with them as a gift.   Want to jazz up the presentation of a special meal? Buy a little hunk of dry ice from a local ice house. Put it in a bowl of water and place it on your serving tray. You’ll create wondrous, billowing white clouds!   It’s romantic—but commonplace—to eat dinner by candlelight. So here’s a change of pace: Eat breakfast by candlelight.   Take your lover on a surprise two-week vacation to Paris.   Many couples have “His” and “Hers” matching towels, but here are some other ideas: “His” and “Hers” matching silk pyjamas, motorcycles, T-shirts, overnight bags (have them packed at all times), jack-o’-lanterns at Halloween, rocking chairs, Porsches (millionaires need love, too), heart-shaped tattoos, Christmas tree...

Read More
Marriage: Meeting the Need for Affection
Jun24

Marriage: Meeting the Need for Affection

  The feelings of love that we have for our partner are certainly real for us. However, what happens when we lack the ability to fully express that love? While it may be innate to express some sort of affection when being physically intimate, many people have difficulties expressing affection in day-to-day activities. Affection is learnt from our parents, family and friends while growing up. Unfortunately, some families do not show affection amongst themselves or to their children and this can lead to adults that have never truly learned how to express their love to their partners. The following from Dr. Harley at Marriage Builders, is on how to teach people to show affection in a marriage. In this case men are given as an example, but the same method could of course be used with women. Whenever I counsel a man who is not very affectionate, I give him a list of things to do every day. (I usually make up the list with his wife who tells me what to include.) He must do each of them and check them off the list as he does it. Here is a general example.   Hug and kiss your wife and tell her you love her every morning while you’re still in bed. Rub her back for a few minutes before you get up. Tell her that you love her while you are having breakfast together. Kiss her and tell her you love her before you leave for work. Call her during the day to ask how she is doing and that you love her....

Read More